How do you beat that
Posted by Rael on Sunday, April 2, 2017 Under: Random
Last night I got to see my all time favourite band again. It's only the second time I've managed to and I'm surprised I managed this time money wise. Whatever comes now though it was worth it. The one band that I will go to see as many times as I can, most if I have seen once I will use the opportunity to see another I haven't but I will always go to these.
Assemblage 23 is by a long shot the only band that has ever mattered to me this much. As much as I look forwards to every remix, every cover or new album I could be happy even if there was to be no more, if he retired or just had enough or anything. There is enough to sustain me, not a single song that I couldn't listen to over and over again.
Also one of the few bands that can reduce me to now thinking I made a fool of myself xD I was very fortunate to get to meet them and get two things signed that I had been dying to. I also managed to get a photo with both them and Rainland one the fantastic support bands. This is completely as happy as I can get, and for anyone that knows certain things then that is pretty fucking happy heh. It also has a tendency to make me write dumb gushing messages to said people, I still mostly don't regret it. I meant every word that I remember putting (this is why I dont drink or anything anymore, I can't remember as it is lol) and I daren't go back and read my message. My real annoyance is that I still haven't figured out how to do paragraphs on fb messenger so it is pretty much a wall of text.
Luckily the point of it was not to get a reply, I can't beat having my arm around them all anyway that is going to keep me going and I am so glad I have photographic proof for when I'm struggling to hold on to it. Plus I have the video that the bf took of his favourite track, I just wish I'd known before that the video on that was decent I would have requested some.
I've managed to remember and note down what I think is all of the setlist but I have it in my head that I'm missing something. That isn't a new feeling though. Right now I am just hovering between manic (but not the iffy one) or sinking into an oblivion of what feels like the greatest loss ever. I honestly know that if I had the money I would follow them for every part of every tour, and then another band or multiple in between until they tour again xD
It's a strange feeling being in the middle like this. I really feel like I can control which way it goes, up or down, I just haven't figured out how to get a balance. I haven't slept in a few days though AND missed my pills which was just dumb of me.
Deep down I know I have 2 more concerts to look forwards to, Diary Of Dreams and Skinny Puppy, but right now all I can do is sit and was youtube videos of A23, I'e created a folder for what I think was the setlist (no order, just knowing which were played and being able to separate them from what I've been listening to non-stop for weeks lol) on my mp3 player for work. There's a depressing thought, to go back to that after all this. But only I can do anything about that, if only I could have the faintest clue how o_O
Music keeps me alive, it has done for so long now, there is always something coming out from one band or another, even if it isn't A23 which of course I would prefer! The best thing is, it gives people the strength to keep going no matter what, the power within themselves to do it and not always to look outwards. There is something in all music that touches people and brings them out of themselves. I never trust anyone that says they don't listen to music, no matter what kind of music it is, rap, pop, metal, ebm, industrial, future-pop. All of it means something to someone and that is why all types of music should be respected, somewhere there is someone who has been reached by it when nothing else could reach them.
I don't do people, I am horrifically bad at dealing with people, and yet for this I actually approached Ian of Rainland. I don't know why I'm always so surprised when people turn out to be nice people, even when I have seen that they are. I think I expect it to be me that they have an adverse reaction to heh. When he took me back to get those things signed every single person in there was so generous even though they had just been on stage. That's what music does for me, gives me courage when I don't think I have it and also is the one thing I tend to be able to talk to people about even when they don't know the music at all.
It feels wrong to just be sat here, I know I need to as pain is flaring up and there isn't even anything that is going to fill the hole it seems there is in me at the moment. I have a choice right now what to fill it with, I have a feeling that this massively long message it the high coming out, that's likely a good thing as in the back of my mind if I can still recognize it and clearly have been putting it into writing this (with A23 on loud in the background obviously :) ) then either the pills I finally remembered to take are kicking in or I have managed to do what I thought I couldn't and actually balance this. The main test will be tomorrow I think.
Anyone who reads this (ha) should listen to Assemblage 23 and Rainland immediately. I actually have a feeling I will be posting some videos soon. Not my precious band pictures though, then you would have to look at me xD Time to drink more energy drinks (still not hungry oddly but happily) and see where things go until the next gig (that's the Diary Of Dreams one).
Assemblage 23 is by a long shot the only band that has ever mattered to me this much. As much as I look forwards to every remix, every cover or new album I could be happy even if there was to be no more, if he retired or just had enough or anything. There is enough to sustain me, not a single song that I couldn't listen to over and over again.
Also one of the few bands that can reduce me to now thinking I made a fool of myself xD I was very fortunate to get to meet them and get two things signed that I had been dying to. I also managed to get a photo with both them and Rainland one the fantastic support bands. This is completely as happy as I can get, and for anyone that knows certain things then that is pretty fucking happy heh. It also has a tendency to make me write dumb gushing messages to said people, I still mostly don't regret it. I meant every word that I remember putting (this is why I dont drink or anything anymore, I can't remember as it is lol) and I daren't go back and read my message. My real annoyance is that I still haven't figured out how to do paragraphs on fb messenger so it is pretty much a wall of text.
Luckily the point of it was not to get a reply, I can't beat having my arm around them all anyway that is going to keep me going and I am so glad I have photographic proof for when I'm struggling to hold on to it. Plus I have the video that the bf took of his favourite track, I just wish I'd known before that the video on that was decent I would have requested some.
I've managed to remember and note down what I think is all of the setlist but I have it in my head that I'm missing something. That isn't a new feeling though. Right now I am just hovering between manic (but not the iffy one) or sinking into an oblivion of what feels like the greatest loss ever. I honestly know that if I had the money I would follow them for every part of every tour, and then another band or multiple in between until they tour again xD
It's a strange feeling being in the middle like this. I really feel like I can control which way it goes, up or down, I just haven't figured out how to get a balance. I haven't slept in a few days though AND missed my pills which was just dumb of me.
Deep down I know I have 2 more concerts to look forwards to, Diary Of Dreams and Skinny Puppy, but right now all I can do is sit and was youtube videos of A23, I'e created a folder for what I think was the setlist (no order, just knowing which were played and being able to separate them from what I've been listening to non-stop for weeks lol) on my mp3 player for work. There's a depressing thought, to go back to that after all this. But only I can do anything about that, if only I could have the faintest clue how o_O
Music keeps me alive, it has done for so long now, there is always something coming out from one band or another, even if it isn't A23 which of course I would prefer! The best thing is, it gives people the strength to keep going no matter what, the power within themselves to do it and not always to look outwards. There is something in all music that touches people and brings them out of themselves. I never trust anyone that says they don't listen to music, no matter what kind of music it is, rap, pop, metal, ebm, industrial, future-pop. All of it means something to someone and that is why all types of music should be respected, somewhere there is someone who has been reached by it when nothing else could reach them.
I don't do people, I am horrifically bad at dealing with people, and yet for this I actually approached Ian of Rainland. I don't know why I'm always so surprised when people turn out to be nice people, even when I have seen that they are. I think I expect it to be me that they have an adverse reaction to heh. When he took me back to get those things signed every single person in there was so generous even though they had just been on stage. That's what music does for me, gives me courage when I don't think I have it and also is the one thing I tend to be able to talk to people about even when they don't know the music at all.
It feels wrong to just be sat here, I know I need to as pain is flaring up and there isn't even anything that is going to fill the hole it seems there is in me at the moment. I have a choice right now what to fill it with, I have a feeling that this massively long message it the high coming out, that's likely a good thing as in the back of my mind if I can still recognize it and clearly have been putting it into writing this (with A23 on loud in the background obviously :) ) then either the pills I finally remembered to take are kicking in or I have managed to do what I thought I couldn't and actually balance this. The main test will be tomorrow I think.
Anyone who reads this (ha) should listen to Assemblage 23 and Rainland immediately. I actually have a feeling I will be posting some videos soon. Not my precious band pictures though, then you would have to look at me xD Time to drink more energy drinks (still not hungry oddly but happily) and see where things go until the next gig (that's the Diary Of Dreams one).
In : Random
Tags: assemblage23 a23 rainland electrowerkz music live
Morbid and warped sense of humour. This blog will, over time, give more of a (albeit shallow) insight into me than anything I write could.